YOUNG PEOPLE FUCKING

Young People Fucking (2008) dir. Martin Gero
Starring: Aaron Abrams, Carly Pope, Kristin Booth, Callum Blue, Ennis Esmer

***1/2

Much talk surrounds the now infamous Canadian film “Young People Fucking”. Controversy about the porn-sounding title prompted the creation of a pending Canadian bill giving the Feds the right to rescind tax credits on the basis of content thus adding risk to an already volatile financing system for domestic films – but more importantly censorship of Canadian culture.

There are few things that Canadians do well in film – animation, mockumentaries, documentaries are a few – but also sex. Sex on film in Canada is like musicals to MGM, gangster movies to Warner Bros and horror films for Universal. We seem to have a knack at showing some good old-fashioned fucking on screen. More importantly the system allows us the freedom to show this. Atom Egoyan and David Cronenberg made careers out of weird fetish sex. And even Canada’s most successful commercial film, the raunchy sex comedy “Porky’s” established one of the industry’s venerable financing institutions – The Harold Greenberg Fund. The sex in that film is still paying off 25 years later.

It would be a shame if “Young People Fucking” were squashed because of its salacious title. In fact, its title is one of the most inspired marketing tools to cross our screens in a while, and which will likely ensure it’s inevitable success. But is the film any good? Yes.

YPF is simple and transparent in its concept. Off the top we’re told we’ll be following one night in the lives of 5 couples – “the friends”: two longtime friends who desire to be fuck-buddies; “the exes”: two former lovers attempting to rekindle a romance; “the first date”: a couple finishing off their first date with a night of hot sex; “the couple” a boyfriend and girlfriend trying to buck the tedium of routine sex; and “the roommates” the film’s only threesome.

Within each night of complex courtship, we see the five stages of sex: interlude, foreplay, sex, orgasm and afterglow. As in traditional ensemble films each scene is intercut with each other showing how each couple makes it through some of the most awkward, embarrassing, frustrating and complex baggage to simply have a little sex. The only thread that links everything together is the f**king.

Like a good screenwriter Martin Gero sets goals for his characters and throws in as many obstacles as possible to keep them from achieving them. Gero keeps the situations realistic and observational – like a scene in Seinfeld expanded into a feature. But sex provides enough complex intricacies that there’s more than enough material to sustain and warrant a feature film treatment.

YPF could also be called “Young People Talking”, because there’s lots and lots of talk. Certainly more talk than sex. Cleverly Gero’s obstacles derive from the excess chatter his neurotic characters incessantly spew out in the most ill timed moments. Just when the romance is cruising along for our characters, a look, or a line strikes a neurosis that halts the action and creates conflict. The characters have the self-observational insight of a Woody Allen and the blockhead common sense of a Kevin Smith.

The reliance on chatter also prevents the film was breaking out and becoming a great film. The second act drags – drags a lot actually. Its contained concept starts to feel claustrophobic somewhere during the ‘foreplay’ segments. The exclusive bedroom locale and limited characters almost wear out its welcome. A ‘wildcard’ (a new character or element or location) is needed to alleviate its predictability and spin the film in a new direction.

In the end the audience gets what it wants, good comedy – and good sex – all tasteful with dollops of non-exploitive nudity. Gero successfully articulates those quandaries, bubble thoughts, and the silent but gnawing frustrations of the act with real world adult intelligence. The Canadian federal government should embrace the only thing other than hockey that we do better than most others - show our uninhibited thoughts about sex on screen. Everyone else seems to like it. Enjoy.

FOOL'S GOLD

Fool’s Gold (2008) dir. Andy Tennant
Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Kate Hudson, Donald Sutherland, Ray Winstone

*1/2

It was a good try, but “Fool’s Gold” is a misfire. Andy Tennant's film aspires to be light forgettable entertainment in the classic sense of Hollywood - romance, comedy, adventure, with beautiful people in beautiful locales. Unfortunately, nowadays, mixing these genres rarely works (think “Six Days, Seven Nights”). It requires great skill to suspend the disbelieve of the modern audience and move them around from screwball comedy to island hopping adventure. Audiences either want "Pirates of the Caribbean" or "Hitch" (also directed by Andy Tennant) - "Fool's Gold" wants to be both, but will likely satisfy few.

McConaughey plays Benjamin Finnegan, a treasure hunter who’s been combing the sandbars and coral reefs of the Caribbean for years looking for a booty of lost Spanish treasure. His efforts are spoiled when his boat is inadvertently sunk, rendering him completely penniless and without means of transportation. Meanwhile his wife Tess (Kate Hudson) is about to file divorce papers, thus complicating Ben’s life even further. By coincidence Ben is taken in by a rich aristocrat Nigel Honeycutt (Donald Sutherland) who lives and sails his pocket change away on a gigantic yacht – the same yacht Tess works as a waitress on. Ben tells Tess and Nigel of his new discoveries in his hunt for the treasure. Ben's pitch works and together the four of them (including Nigel’s bimbo socialite daughter) evade Ben’s many nemeses and search for the buried treasure.

“Fools Gold” mixes the childish treasure-hunting actions of “National Treasure” with the light as a feather romance of “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days”, with a dash of rudimentary slapstick comedy. The genre mixing is like oil and water. The filmmakers and the proven comic team should have stuck with the romcom and done away with the action. It seems like the worst attempt to please all audiences while satisfying none.

McConaughey and Hudson are easy on the eyes and they perform reasonably well as the leads. But Andy Tennant wastes the fine talents of a great team of character actors. Ray Winstone is a rival treasure hunter who masks his London working class drole with a useless southern accent, Ewen Bremner, that quirky Scotsman, puts on a Russian accent (why?) and Donald Sutherland, who is usually class personified, is given on a pathetic British accent.

And poor Donald... much of his screen time is spent playing off of Alexis Dziena's drab Paris Hilton impression as Honeycut's spoiled daughter, Gemma. Gemma tags along and desires only to spend her father's money, but of course, the two become closer because of the adventure and learn valuable lessons about each other.

One scene encapsulates the entire film - the lengthy history of the Spanish treasure which McConaughey explains to a confounded and sleepy Donald Sutherland midway through the film. McConaughey's story goes on for five or ten minutes of undisguised exposition in one long continuous speech. Consider it a bedtime story and take a snooze.

"Fool's Gold" is available in DVD June 17 from Warner Home Video

Here's some other related reviews:
National Treasure 2: Book of Secrets
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

Fool's Gold

THE STRANGLERS OF BOMBAY

The Stranglers of Bombay (1959) dir. Terence Fisher
Starring: Guy Rolfe, Jan Holden, Andrew Cruickshank, George Pastell

**1/2

For the unfamiliar Hammer Film Productions was a British production house making low-budget b-movie genre films from the 1930’s through the 70’s. Films such as the “Quartermass”, “Dracula” and “Frankenstein” series’ helped establish the ‘Hammer-Horror’ moniker in their hey-day in the 50’s and 60’s. Despite the low budgets they were highly popular and commercially successful and helped launch the careers of horror stars, Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee and Oliver Reed.

Steven Spielberg and George Lucas were likely a couple of those influential teenagers who watched and fell in love with the schlocky adventure, mystery and suspense of these films. Although it’s widely known the serial matinee films were the biggest inspiration for their Indiana Jones franchise, the Hammer adventure films were likely in their minds as well.

It's good timing that Sony Pictures Home Entertainment has released a two-disc set called the “Icons of Adventure” to capitalize on the Indiana Jones publicity. This set features four schlock classics, including the ridiculously silly but rarely seen and much sought after adventure film, “The Stranglers of Bombay”.

Set in 19th Century India, “The Stranglers of Bombay” tells the story of an intrepid British officer who investigates a secret Indian cult, which has been stealing men, women and children from their homes and raising them to be brainwashed followers of Kali. If this sounds familiar, yes, it could also be the logline for “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom”. Apparently cults like this used to exist in India and were vanquished during the British colonial rule. And so the exotic rituals of self-sacrifice, cannibalism, torture, brainwashing all make for great b-movie material.

Like in “Temple of Doom”, the Hindu god Kali – goddess of death and destruction – commands the evil cultists. Our hero is the scrupulous Capt Harry Lewis, played by the tall, handsome and square-jawed Brit Guy Rolfe (“Taras Bulba”). Lewis is leading the investigation into the mysterious mass kidnappings, but to his dismay he’s being replaced by a snobby upperclassman who’s pushing buttons for the corporate British East Indian Tea Company. When Lewis discovers his replacement is lackadaisical about the investigation Lewis sticks around to continue to unearth the conspiracy himself. His sleuthing uncovers the evil and malicious cult, brainwashed and trained to strangle any and all threats to the society using their ceremonial white scarf – hence “the Stranglers of Bombay”.

This film was notorious in its day for what was, at the time, extreme violence – the type of dark visceral violence Spielberg showed us in “Temple of Doom”. In “Stranglers” we watch the evil cultist cut out victims’ tongues, gauge out their eyes, disembowel and chop off limbs with zombie-like efficient. At one point a prisoner fears the worst and kills himself by jumping into a noose and hanging himself to death before the stranglers can get a hold of him.

Like “Temple of Doom” the depiction of the British as the saviours against the backward uncivilized ways of the Indian people is a racist/white man’s burden point of view. Forgiving this attitude in 1959 is certainly easier than 1984 (the year “Temple of Doom” was released), but in either case, I usually lean toward the artistic license of the filmmakers, rather than political correctness.

Despite the influence and backstory of this long lost Hammer film, “The Stranglers of Bombay” is mild entertainment, providing only a dash of cinematic excitement. Guy Rolfe is no Errol Flynn and Terence Fisher is no Michael Curtiz, but it’s influence on Lucas and Spielberg are undeniable and so these “Icons of Adventure” become essential viewing for Indy fanboys and cine-geeks. Enjoy.

"The Stranglers of Bombay" is available with the 'Icons of Adventure Set' now available from Sony Pictures Home Entertainment.

THE LEECH WOMAN

Image courtesy of DVD Beaver

The Leech Woman (1960) dir. Edward Dein
Starring: Coleen Gray, Phillip Terry, Grant Williams and Gloria Talbott
Horror

**1/2

Guest Review By Greg Klymkiw

Paul and June Talbot (Coleen Gray and Phillip Terry respectively) are just your average American couple. Paul is a scientist (mad, of course) who is attempting to discover a potion that will allow him to reverse the aging process. June is his loving, booze-swilling, abused and neglected wife. The once-loving pair face the usual problems of nuptial bliss gone sour: Paul, in spite of the fact that he’s rather ugly and old, is able to instill feelings of inadequacy in his gorgeous wife who, in turn, feels old, ugly and frumpy in spite of the fact that she’s only in her mid-to-late-30s and pretty much a babe (albeit a slightly dowdy one). If only her hubby could find a way to make his better half, a truly better half.

Such are the typical concerns of Cold War America in the 50s and thankfully we have motion pictures such as “The Leech Woman” to provide this revealing glimpse into the lives and dreams of Joe and Josephina Average.

Directed by the competent, but otherwise unexciting Edward Dein, “The Leech Woman” is yet another welcome feature entry in Universal Home Video’s magnificent DVD box-set “The Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection”. While, the picture is not really science fiction, but horror, that’s probably a quibble of the least important kind. What really matters is that it’s a Universal Production – always the sign of quality for genre pictures.

Being from Universal is especially welcome because the picture boasts some really fine studio production value – albeit of the low budget variety, but the kind of studio elements that can contribute rather successfully to creating a property that soars rather than sinks. For example, the pace of the picture is totally bat-out-of-hell and ultimately just the perfect running time (under 80 minutes). This should come as no surprise since the picture was edited by the legendary Universal Pictures in-house cutter Milton Carruth who provided the magnificent cinematic sheep shearing on such timeless celluloid bon-bons as Tod Browning’s “Dracula”, Karl Freund’s “The Mummy”, the famed Jimmy Stewart and Marlene Dietrich western “Destry Rides Again”, all of Douglas Sirk’s classic melodramas, the archetypal 50s sex comedy “Pillow Talk” and my personal favourites – the “Francis the Talking Mule” pictures.

Another added bonus to this particular Universal production is some truly excellent makeup design from in-house wizard Bud Westmore.

Most importantly, the technical credits do not overshadow some of the more entertaining and interesting aspects of this picture – namely, the almost feminist perspective on how women are forced into certain ideals by a world dominated by men and how they can get a little self-respect and, of course, payback.

Payback in this picture comes via Old Malla (veteran Broadway actress Estelle Hemsley), a mysterious African woman who appears to have the secret to age-reversal. When hubby drags his maligned wifey into the deepest, darkest jungle in search of the ingredients to restore beauty and youth - salvation and horror alternately lurk around the corner.

And they both involve the piercing of the pineal gland.

And eventually, the picture delivers up even more Universal Pictures delights – the welcome presence of the stalwart and studly Grant Williams (“Incredible Shrinking Man”) and the utterly cream-wrenching Gloria (“I Married A Monster From Outer Space”) Talbott.

And have I mentioned the piercing of the pineal gland yet?

And, even more tantalizing are the native rituals in the jungle. What self-respecting 50s genre film would NOT have native rituals in the jungle?

“The Leech Woman” is a supremely entertaining entry in the 50s canon of genre pictures from Universal. It’s fun, provocative and even a bit creepy.

And, uh . . . it features the piercing of the pineal gland.

“The Leech Woman” is available in the “The Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection” from Universal Studios Home Entertainment.

Please browse other reviews from this collection:
The Incredible Shrinking Man
Dr. Cyclops

THE BUCKET LIST

The Bucket List (2007) dir. Rob Reiner
Starring: Jack Nicholson, Morgan Freeman, Sean Hayes

***

“The Bucket List” is a surprisingly engrossing and thoughtful film about dying. Jack Nicholson’s character asks the question early on in the film, ‘would you want to know the date of your death?’ It’s a surprisingly profound question for a film, which, according to the marketing campaigns and trailer, was another film about grumpy old men acting silly for the sake of comedy. Instead “the Bucket List” is a well crafted character film featuring two great actors acting out a moderately intelligent script.

Morgan Freeman’s typical morose but soothing voiceover is heard describing his friend Edward Cole and how he lived the final years of his adventurous life. Freeman plays Carter Chambers who first meets Cole (Jack Nicholson) sharing a room in the hospital. They’re both diagnosed with cancer, and despite the fact Cole owns the hospital, his policy of two beds per room – no exceptions – holds for even him. Cole and Chambers are the typical odd couple - Cole, a jetsetting/playboy health care entrepreneur, and Chambers a humble working class mechanic and do-good family man. Cole and Chambers are not oil and water though, they hit it off immediately and start a unique friendship.

When they both receive the bad news prognosis they decide to take a vacation together to fulfill each of their lives’ unfulfilled dreams. This ‘to do list’ takes them across the world, skydiving out of airplanes, racing stock cars and other extreme activities. As their journey progresses lifelong insecurities are discovered, and their list changes gradually to list items of deeper emotional meaning, which will ultimately fulfill the lives even greater.

“The Bucket List” has the foundation of a solid character-based script, and the great acting talents of Nicholson and Freeman elevate the material to something beyond what could be conveyed in the silly Holiday-friendly trailer.

The first act is key to establishing the tone and the characters’ burgeoning relationship. Unlike the “Odd Couple” mold, bickering comic conflict is kept to a minimum, instead we develop sympathy for both men as they go through the rigors of chemotherapy, surgery and the emotional distress of knowing the end is near. The audience discovers Cole and Chambers over the course of the film instead of relying on clichés to separate the characters into archetypes.

Let’s not confuse “The Bucket List” with Ingmar Bergman though either. Though the characters are interesting and likeable they don’t run much deeper than the honest working class family man and the millionaire playboy with no family – which, of course, implies that the family man is the one who is actually ‘wealthier’.

Some sloppy bluescreen matting which puts Jack and Morgan in Egypt and other places around the world is distracting, same with those moments of silliness which we saw in the trailer and the especially syrupy denouement. But the sum of its parts is a noble film worthy of the body of work of both actors. It’s also Rob Reiner’s best film since the mid 90’s and worthy of a look even if you’re under aged 65. Enjoy.

"The Bucket List" is available on DVD and Blu-Ray this week from Warner Home Video

The Bucket List

SEMI-PRO

Semi-Pro (2008) dir. Kent Alterman
Starring: Will Ferrall, Woody Harrelson, Andre Benjamin, Maura Tierney

**

Will Ferrell once again dips into the well of his favourite topics - the 1970’s and popular sports – to create another comic vehicle for himself. This time its ABA basketball where he plays Jackie Moon – a player/owner/impresario who desires to join the NBA to make his teammates’ dreams come true. “Semi-Pro” is a lesser hybrid of “Anchorman”, “Talledega Nights” and “Blades of Glory”. While the film fails to generate laughs, the mere fact Will Ferrell is in it makes it worth a look.

Will Ferrell plays Jackie Moon, owner/player for the Flint Tropics, a semi-professional basketball team located in Flint Michigan. It’s a pathetic league with barely enough fans in the stands to pay the players’ salaries. Moon is a better showman than he is a player and he puts his enthusiasm for the team into his elaborate publicity stunts. Jackie’s dream comes true when he finds out the ABA will merge with the NBA – unfortunately only top 4 teams will be taken over. Jackie employs the help of the washed up former NBA player Monix (Woody Harrleson) to help his team go from last to fourth.

The filmmakers, writers, and actors all try their best, put on their funny costumes and say their funny jokes, but very few of the gags hit their mark. Comedy is the toughest genre and on paper, “Semi-Pro” likely appeared as good “Anchorman” or “Talladega Nights”. Unfortunately it’s no where near the class of those two films. Structurally they’re the same film – another exploitation of the sport genre - but the magic touch of comedy just fails to strike.

It's not without merit though. Without specific reference, the mere fact the film is set in Flint Michigan, is an inspired decision. As most know Flint was once a thriving industrial city in the 1970’s, which fell upon hard times when the automakers left for abroad. Some may see the setting as in bad taste – using the plight of Flint as a gag - but I found the death of the enthusiastic ABA league a tragic ironic metaphor for the death of American working class industry - seriously.

The Will Ferrell comedies are always hit and miss – particularly the above-mentioned titles. But the one thing they have in common is that they all have increased in popularity since their initial release. Why is that? The Will Ferrell brand is hardly the stuff of intellectual subtext requiring multiple viewings to sink in. The expectations never change on his films, yet with each of the above – including “Old School” – they seemed to be funnier the second and third times around.

Will “Semi-Pro” increase in value with age? I’m sure it will. A similar comment from a reader was made about the unfunny and childish “Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story”. That film is no classic as of yet, but give both of them five more years and I suspect we’ll be singing a different tune.

“Semi-Pro” is now available on DVD from Alliance Films in Canada and New Line Home Entertainment in the U.S.

GARDEN OF EVIL

Garden of Evil (1954) dir. Henry Hathaway
Starring: Gary Cooper, Susan Hayward, Richard Widmark

**1/2

"Garden of Evil" is a late Gary Cooper westerner, from efficient studio goto director Henry Hathaway. It's a familiar genre film about two shady fortune hunters that help a woman find her husband trapped in a mine and then battle apaches during their escape home. This dime a dozen western is only worth a second look for the stunning Mexican locales shot in lush widescreen colour photography

Gary Cooper and Widmark play Hooker and Fiske, two opportunistic prospectors who have stopped off in a coastal Mexican town. They are given an offer of $2000 by a desperate woman Leah (Susan Hayward) to help travel inland and save her husband who's fallen in a mine. For the large fee, the wily pair sense there's more to the task than just saving her husband, Surely enough it's Apache territory, which means a life-threatening adventure. The two men, joined by their colleague Luke (Cameron Mitchell) begin the search and rescue mission.

They follow the meandering trail through the beautiful mountains and canyons of interior Mexico. They do find Leah's husband, but he's so badly hurt he's immovable, and certainly in no shape to fight, fend off or even flee the oncoming Apaches. A number of moral conundrums emerge, which leads to dramatic acts of honourable sacrifice and tragic heroism.

As standard for the genre, not much is known of Gary Cooper’s character. Richard Widmark's Fiske is the gambler who angles to discover his identity and background, but in the tradition of the classic genre heroes he stays aloof and mysterious. In fact, all characters are varied shades of black with their own selfish agenda. Human life is disposable commodity, especially with the prospect of gold and other riches. But when the stakes are on the line, the true heroes eventually emerge.

The lush green landscape of Mexico is a welcomed change from the usual dusty deserts of the Western genre. The film moves through a series of unfamiliar locations - a local Mexican town, "Tepatzlan", the green jungles near Acapulco, the and black volcanic sands of the Parícutin Mountain - and could serve as a Discovery Channel travelogue of Mexico.

The first act is highlighted by an especially thrilling sequence following the convoy's treacherous journey across the sharp cliff of a canyon. The great special effects master Ray Kellogg creates several great epic composite shots making the long drop down look even more dangerous.

Another highlight is the music of Bernard Herrman - a pleasant surprise in the opening credits. In the opening scenes especially, his music adds great suspense and that sense of impended dread which he has brought to his greatest scores. His 'action' music has only a hint of his trademark style, but it trumps of the standardness of the written material.

"Garden of Evil" was a large cinemascope picture, made in those early days of widescreen and aggrandizes the film above its mediocre content. Consider this one for western and cinemascope fans only. Enjoy.

"Garden of Evil" is available in the three-disc 'Fox Westerns" set now available on DVD

THE OTHER BOLEYN GIRL

The Other Boleyn Girl (2008) dir. Justin Chadwick
Starring: Natalie Portman, Scarlett Johanson, Eric Bana, David Morrissey

**1/2

Justin Chadwick’s adaptation of Philippa Gregory’s best selling novel took some hard knocks from critics earlier this year. It’s not all that bad – standard Tutor-fare which certainly doesn’t hit the high marks of the Shekhar Kapur films (ok, that was “Elizabeth” but close enough) or the classic Hal B. Wallis films of the late 60’s/early 70’s, but the time period produces such historically significant drama, it’s still provides compelling material.

We’re back in the days of Henry VIII and Katherine of Aragon. This version of the story takes place from the point of view of the Boleyn house – a family of semi-nobleman and women who desperately desire to achieve wealth, and power. There’s the two Boleyn girls Mary (Scarlett Johanson) and Anne (Natalie Portman). There’s also their brother George (Jim Sturgess) and their father and mother (Mark Rylance and Kristin Scott Thomas). The head of the household is Anne and Mary’s uncle, the Duke of Norfolk (David Morrissey).

When King Henry makes a royal visit to the Boleyn’s county, the Duke commands to Anne to seduce the King to become one of his royal courtiers. But the King takes a liking to Mary instead. Even though Mary is married, the Duke assigns her to take Anne’s place in the King’s bed. Mary’s honour to her family takes precedent and she reluctantly does the deed. Sibling rivalry is sparked in addition to the internal political war between Henry’s wife Katherine, the Catholic Church and the dueling Boleyns. The film follows the proper track of history and hits the usual benchmarks: Henry’s need for a male heir, the creation of the Church of England and those bloody beheadings.

“The Other Boleyn Girl” works best in the beginning when director Chadwick and writer Peter Morgan (“The Queen”) set up the chess pieces. Emotions are highest early when crucial decisions are made by Anne and Mary to do their uncle’s bidding. The internal turmoil of Mary separating from her husband for the sake of her family is well dramatized by Johansson. The intrigue falls off in the second half when the film fast-forwards through history hastily glancing over Henry’s divorce from Katherine, his break from the Church and his burgeoning relationship with Jane Seymour.

Natalie Portman is the stand out. Her Anne Boleyn is the opportunist, the younger of the sisters and therefore the most neglected. Her sibling rivalry with Mary moves from clichéd melodrama to surprisingly poignant fraternal companionship over the course of the film. Boleyn’s final moments before her head-chopping (that shouldn’t be a spoiler to people) is undeniably one of Portman’s finest moments of acting. Chadwick does get it all right in the end with his powerful finale.

Eric Bana’s Henry VIII could have been played by any old hack. His character is mostly inactive and insignificant and only window-dressing to the political activity of the Boleyns. In fact, the filmmakers have Anne Boleyn, without even Henry Tutor present, plan his secession from the Catholic Church. As a result Henry VIII becomes a clichéd supporting character. David Morrissey’s Duke of Norfolk is also a cliché – a power hungry son-of-a-bitch that whores out his nieces like a brothel. But where the film becomes intriguing is his rationalization of the activities. In these royal and noble courts, sons and daughters are like chess pieces, to help families gain wealth and power. Unfortunately the Duke is never humanized, he’s played as a one note, moustache-twirling conspirator.

This story has been told numerous times from many points of view : Henry VIII of course, in many film, even Oliver Cromwell and Sir Thomas More have there own versions. For me, Charles Jarrott’s “Anne of the Thousand Days” with Genevieve Bujold as Anne Boleyn is the best Boleyn film. Though “The Other Boleyn Girl”doesn’t this epic greatness, is still a decent romp through the court of the Tutors. Enjoy.

Compare this review with:
Anne of the Thousand Days
Elizabeth
Elizabeth: the Golden Age

The Other Boleyn G...

THREE STOOGES COLLECTION VOLUME TWO

The Three Stooges Collection Volume Two (1937-39)
Starring: Larry Fine, Moe Howard, Curley Howard

***1/2

Guest review by Matt Reid

I have many fond childhood memories of growing up and watching the Three Stooges early on Sunday mornings on television. My sister, on the other hand, considers them the most moronic thing ever put on film. Over Christmas, as I forced my family to watch “The Three Stooges Collection Volume 1”, she just shook her head at me as I laughed away. So with that said, it’s clear the Three Stooges is a love or hate relationship, which can either divide families, or unite them in laughter.

I always loved Moe Howard the best. Why was this? Moe was the ‘boss’ and, according to my sister, when growing up, whatever game was played, I had to be the ‘boss’ (example: Me: “Let’s play gas station…..I’m the manager”). However, watching the Stooges again allowed me to appreciate Curly’s great gifts as a physical comedian, from his trademarked ‘spin on the floor’ to his double takes, to the fear evident when he realizes he just accidentally hit Moe with something. Curly’s character is basically that of the naïve (youngest) child which works well with the rest of the family dynamic – with Moe as the highly disapproving parent, and Larry the ‘trying-to-be-responsible-but-failing-spectacularly’ older child. Larry in general doesn’t get the unanimous fan love of Moe or Curly, but he’s integral to the trio. The other two are such extreme caricatures that Moe, by comparison, assumes the ‘straightman role (plus, comedy always comes in threes, right?).

The Three Stooges Collection Volume 2 is the second in a presumably 9 volume series (knowing that the Stooges made 190 shorts). Columbia/Sony had released ‘themed’ collections in the early 2000’s, but the fan demand for chronological collections eventually caused them to adopt this new release strategy. And for a serious fan, this is a great way to watch them - you can see where some of their recurring gags first started and chart their evolution to become a well-oiled comedy team. Some gags were repeated numerous times over the years, including Curly going wild when he hears/sees something specific (in ‘Grips, Grunts & Groans’, it’s when he smells the Wild Hyacinth perfume), only to be calmed down in some bizarre fashion (in this case, removing his shoes and tickling his feet). Another was dressing as Santa Claus to sneak into a palace, first used in ‘Wee Wee Monsieur’. Ironically this joke is much more recognized as a gag in one of the later shorts with Shemp ‘Malice in the Palace’ (likely owing to the fact that ‘Malice’ is one of four Stooges shorts in the public domain). It’s interesting to note where Stooges gags found their way into other film/TV shows over the years. One example: in ‘Playing the Ponies’, the window sign in their restaurant reads ‘Special: Lobster w/Frogs Legs’. This joke was referenced many years later on “the Simpsons” when Homer asks for the ‘finest food stuffed with the second finest food’ at a particular restaurant (the waiter’s answer: ‘Lobster stuffed with tacos. Excellent choice, sir.’). I obviously wasn’t the only one deeply affected by those Sunday morning airings.

For the shorts themselves, there are a number of similarities that define almost all of them. The plots are fairly rudimentary; the setting/situation serves to set up the boys to do their comedy bits. They usually play lower-class individuals (with generally good intentions, such as helping a sick boy in ‘Cash & Carry’) and come into conflict with some other group: sometimes an unsavory crowd (such as a mob-backed plan to steal their Dad’s money in ‘Three Dumb Clucks’ or gold-digging women after Curly’s new fortune in ‘Healthy, Wealthy & Dumb’) but sometimes as high society as in ‘Termites of 1938’.

On the flip side, when consuming a large number of these shorts at a time, noticeable differences emerge between them, specifically in the amount of violence. ‘Cash & Carry’ is especially violent with gags involving shovels, pick axes and more, while ‘Mutts to You’ kept it to a minimum, relying more on violence-free physical comedy. (As a side note, I won’t even get into some of the racial stereotypes in certain shorts, which unfortunately were a part of many films of the time)

Not everything in this second volume of The Three Stooges Collection scores. There’s varying quality which is natural with such a high output of work. But the general quality of shorts in this collection is pretty high throughout, with a couple of standouts: ‘Goofs & Saddles’, which features the Stooges trying to smoke out some cattle rustlers in the Old West, ‘Tassels in the Air’ with Moe mistaken for the famous interior decorator, Omay, and ‘Violent is the Word for Curly’, again a case of mistaken identity, this time the Stooges are believed to be college professors, which also gives us a memorable song by the boys, ‘Swinging the Alphabet’.

Overall, a great addition to the collection of any fan of the Three Stooges or classic comedy in general.

“The Three Stooges Collection Volume Two” is now available on DVD from Sony Pictures Home Entertainment

NIGHTMARE DETECTIVE

Nightmare Detective (2007) dir. Shinya Tsukamoto
Starring: Hitomi, Masanobu Ando, Ryuhei Matsuda, Shinya Tsukamoto

*1/2

I came into "Nightmare Detective" with no context or knowledge of the story or the filmmaker. I confess only a surface knowledge of the J-Horror genre - regrettably from the American remakes only. So as an unbiased, blank slate screening the film is an awful amateurish mess and poor excuse for a horror film.

So how did this seemingly forgettable and disposable piece of sub-standardness ever beat out other horror films to make it across the world and land on our DVD shelves? After doing some research I realized the director, Shinya Tsukamoto, is the cultish director of the Tetsuo films. I could barely sit through the first "Tetsuo" film, and so it would appear I am not the audience for "Nightmare Detective". But I've seen enough horror films to know this film does not past muster no matter who's directing it.

Japanese pop star Hitomi plays Keiko Kirishima, an academic criminalogist who eagerly wants to make the switch into real-world homicide cases. Her assignment is a strange case of several individuals who have killed themselves in their sleep. Keiko discovers the common link between them all is a mysterious man named "0" whom they all called just before going to bed and falling asleep. Keiko hires a notable dream expert Kyoichi Kagenuma (Ryuhei Matsuda) to aid her in the search. Keiko sets a trap using herself as bait. She calls the same number as the victims hoping the killer would visit her in her dreams, with the Nightmare Detective ready to strike.

Hitori is quite stunning and highly watchable on screen. She holds the film together through the mishmash of stylistic excesses.

Unfortunately that's where the praise ends. There’s no elegance to the film. The choppy editing is awkward and draws unnecessary attention to itself, taking the audience out of the film. A comparable film, "Seven", is not a clean film in any regard, but it's still a polished product. "Nightmare Detective" feels like a low budget indie film by an amateur that is in love with his handheld camera, dissolves, and centre-framing. Tsukamoto also paints a bland a colourless world filled with greys and blacks. A good horror director would know what to do with the shadows and darkness but the colour scheme adds nothing to this film.

And the ridiculous electronic music score cheapens the film even more.

J-Horror fans and the "Tetsuo" cult may find some value in some of the consistencies in technique across Tsukamoto's work, but the plain truth is it would never even see the light of day, if his name wasn't attached.

"Nightmare Detective" is available on DVD from Alliance Films in Canada and Dimension Films/Miramax Home Entertainment in the U.S.

P.S. I LOVE YOU

PS: I Love You (2007) dir. Richard LaGravenese
Starring: Hillary Swank, Lisa Kudrow, Gerard Butler, Harry Connick Jr., Jeffrey Dean Morgan

**

“P.S. I Love You” is one of those impossibly romantic films, about a romance that continues beyond death. Richard LaGravenese, a good writer, but still looking for his first directorial hit, misses the mark again. After a clever hook is established the concept never pays off, instead LaGravanese unnecessarily dances around our expectations ultimately petering the film out over the final two acts.

The short synopsis goes like this: Holly Kennedy (Hillary Swank) and her husband Gerry (Gerard Butler) are a bickering New York couple who fear the financial burdon of the future. When Gerry dies suddenly from a brain tumour, Holly quickly regrets not having enough joy-time in their brief relationship. Months later on Holly’s birthday, a present arrives from the deceased Gerry, who planned an elaborate birthday present/scavenger hunt before his death. A series of letters have been mailed to her in various places which takes her on a journey of self-discovery, catharsis and ultimately true undying love.

After establishing the central hook, Gerry’s port-mortum treasure hunt, the film should have basically written itself. There’s a very predictable trajectory which LaGravenese could have taken, or the “National Treasure” route - having Holly find and follow clues planted by Gerry to help her cherish their relationship further and help Holly move on to the next stage in life. Perhaps this was LaGravenese’s intention, but it feels obscured, when a clear simple follow through on those expectations would have served the story better. The film takes several unwise detours, most dramatically when Holly discovers her inner 'fashion designer' and starts a career designing shoes. This comes out of left field and takes us off the simplified treasure hunt journey. 

As traditional in the romantic comedy genre LaGravenese gives us two possible romances for Holly to follow. Unfortunately both candidates – Connick Jr and Dean Morgan – are dull as dishwater, and fail to create any sparks. Connick Jr. follows around Holly like a puppy dog desperately wanting some attention and thus a relationship. But knowing she is a widow of his former boss, he comes off as creepy. Jeffrey Dean Morgan, who was cast because of his romantic idol stature from “Grey’s Anatomy” never surfaces to be a credible romantic lead. He seems to be spending too much time getting the Irish accent down than actually acting, being charming and developing his character. Ultimately he’s just dipples with legs.

For the males, Gerard Butler is the only movie star in the film and performs well as the dashing and naively flawed husband. But the film tries to have its cake and eat it too – which is a fundamental flaw of the film. Despite being dead, Gerry (and thus Gerard) continues to be present in the film via the numerous and lengthy flashbacks. In order to give the audience the feeling of despair of losing one’s husband, we shouldn’t see Gerry (and thus Gerard) again. One of the best scenes in the film is when Holly listens to Gerry’s brief voicemail recording over and over just to hear his soothing voice. And so, the emotion of the moment when we hear his voice again on the dictaphone is lost because we’ve continued to see and hear Gerry through her dreams and flashbacks. The smart play would have been to kill Gerry off, and never see him again. But of course Butler is a big star now and needs screen time.

What's frustrating is that “P.S. I Love You” could have been an easy fix in the editing room. Here’s my rough cut notes: take out all the Gerard Butler flashbacks; make Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s character into a closeted shithead who proves to be the wrong guy for Holly; and find the good  performance from Connick Jr, which is probably in there somewhere, thus making his character the next best man for her and give us a satisfying romantic ending.

"P.S. I Love You" is available on DVD and Blu-Ray from Warner Bros Home Entertainment

P.S. I Love You

DR. CYCLOPS

Dr. Cyclops (1940) dir. Ernest B. Schoedsack
Starring: Albert Dekker, Thomas Coley, Janice Logan

***

Guest Review By Greg Klymkiw

The director of “Dr. Cyclops”, Ernest B. Schoedsack, had a life that rivaled the adventures experienced by many of the characters that populated his motion pictures.

At the age of 12, Schoedsack ran away from home. By the age of 17, he was a motion picture cameraman for the legendary comedy producer Mack Sennett. At the tender age of 23, he joined the signal corps as a cinematographer and spent much of World War I in the thick of the most horrendous battles, photographing their every detail. After the armistice was signed, he paired up with another young adventurer (Merian C. Cooper) and the two of them became involved in the anti-Bolshevik movement in Russia, Ukraine and Poland.

And this was all before he became the groundbreaking director of some of cinema’s greatest adventures.

While it’s not necessary to know the breadth of Schoedsack’s considerable life experience in order to enjoy his motion pictures, there’s something that’s both moving and admirable to know that adventure fantasies such as “King Kong”, “The Four Feathers”, “The Last Days of Pompeii” and “The Most Dangerous Game” came from an imagination that was tempered with having seen and done so much as a young man. Schoedsack’s work is imbued with a sense of wonder, adventure and, most importantly, exploration. What’s especially amazing about Schoedsack’s work on “Dr. Cyclops” is realizing that it was made in 1940.

1940!!!

Schoedsack, endowed as he was with a great eye and a knack for special effects was – to put it mildly – one hell of a photographer and filmmaker. His work in this picture laid the visual groundwork (as Kong most certainly did) for generations of films and filmmakers to follow.

“Dr. Cyclops” is the fun and thrilling tale of a truly mad scientist (deliciously and brilliantly portrayed by the bald and coke-bottle-lensed Albert Dekker) who uses radium to shrink people and animals alike in a crazed attempt to rule the world. The picture not only features staggeringly gorgeous three-strip Technicolor photography, but a variety of eye-popping special effects that, for their day, would have knocked people on their buttocks and which are, even by today’s standards, quite magical.

The heroes and heroines of the piece pale, of course, beside the tragically obsessive central character who is both literally and figuratively blinded – as the title even implies – but this too is par for the course in a sci-fi melodrama on the scale of this one, and while familiar, it fits comfortably like a comfy, old sweater.

“Dr. Cyclops” is not the masterpiece that “King Kong” was, but in its own special way, it was definitely ahead of its time in terms of both special effects and political/historical considerations and it amply provides solid entertainment to anyone who loves genre pictures. The picture’s exploration of a “foreign” enemy wanting to experiment upon and ultimately subjugate American interests also pre-dates that attitudes so prevalent over one decade later during the sci-fi pictures made during the Cold War.

“Dr. Cyclops” is a most welcome addition to the second volume of Universal’s magnificent DVD box-set entitled The Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection. It’s a gorgeous transfer of a fine little picture and while it’s certainly worth renting, the price point on this box is so reasonable that fans would be well advised to just buy it.

"Dr. Cyclops" is available in the Classic Sci-Fi Ultimate Collection now available from Universal Studios Home Entertainment

VINCE VAUGHN'S WILD WEST COMEDY SHOW

Vince Vaughn’s Wild West Comedy Show (2008) dir. Ari Sandel
Documentary

***1/2

Ari Sandel and Vince Vaughn’s stand-up comic road movie arrives on DVD today. Vince Vaughn’s celebrity provides the entry point into the lives and careers of four aspiring stand up comics plucked from the Comedy Store, thrown in a van for a thirty day tour  across the American heartland. It’s a fun ride, providing more than enough gut busting laughs.

In his opening voiceover (a voicemail actually) he describes his intent to find four of the most promising comics from the legendary Comedy Store (the origins of Richard Pryor and Robin Williams) and bring them on a vaudeville-style road trip in the tradition of the great Buffalo Bill Cody and his Wild West show.

There’s Bret Ernst – a New Yorker – with a self-professed “Guido”-slant to his routine. Ahmed Ahmed is an LA-based comic who, because of his Egyptian heritage takes on the self-depreciating Arab/Terrorist jokes. Sebastian Maniscalca presents another refined uber-male approach like Ernst and John Caparulo does the country-bumpkin routine. Some of Vaughn’s Hollywood pals like Jon Favreau, Justin Long and Dwight Yoakam add some skits and music throughout the shows to round out the Vaudevillian flavour.

Vince puts on his motor mouth schtick of course, but in the opening of the show Jon Favreau gets a clever potshot in about Vince's proclivity to talk. For the most part though Vaughn gives the stage to the performers. Their stand up routines are intercut with each other throughout the film, offering 2-3mins gags which run one after another. Each performer is unique and rarely competes with each other.

As the road trip moves along we get to know the comics as people, outside of their stage personas. But what’s surprising is that their acts reflect their real life situations. John Caparulo who makes no bones about his difficulties picking up women in real life, uses this to fuel his profane-laden routine. Bret Ernst provides some thoughtful poignant reflections on his homosexual brother who died of Aids in 2001. He honours his memory by creating a hilarious but respectable series of jokes about his brother. Same goes with Ahmed’s insecurities of his own heritage and Maniscalca’s struggles with his career.

Stand up comedy is arguably the toughest gig in show business. Maniscala even confesses that most comedians are manic depressives, and go through severe bouts of depression frequently. And so watching the four lads, who become like family over the trip, succeed and get applause and standing ovations, it becomes a satisfying feeling for the audience.

Conflict is kept to the bare minimum, which is ok, because arguments and backstabbing would take valuable time away from the laughs, which in the end trump those “Aristocrats” jokes and practically everything in Jerry Seinfeld’s “Comedian”. Enjoy.

"Vince Vaughn's Wild West Comedy Show" is available on DVD from Alliance Films in Canada and New Line Home Entertainment in the U.S.

Vince Vaughn's Wil...

HOW SHE MOVE

How She Move (2008) dir. Ian Iqbal Rashid
Starring: Ingrid Gaynor, Tre Armstrong, Cle Bennett, Dwain Murphy

***

"How She Move" is a special film. There’s been no other film like it made in a Canada. Director Ian Iqbal Rashid takes a familiar story of a depressed youth who finds her joie de vivre in competitive dance and mashes it with some European social realism to make a unique and crowd-pleasing genre film.

The film begins introducing its humble hero Pam (Ingrid Gaynor), whose sister has just died from a drug overdose and is forced to return from her fancy private school to her lowly urban Toronto public school. It's a humiliating experience for her having to face her old school mates again whom she thought she'd left behind forever. With Pam back to square one, she seeks to rebuild back her career, her relationship with her family and her self-esteem.

After an altercation with school rival and tough girl Michelle (Tre Armstrong), she's forced to team up with her as a tutor. After they settle their differences Michelle brings Pam into her world of competitive urban step dancing. Pam joins with an all male crew badly in need of a creative kick to jump start their routines. In a male-dominated macho world Pam struggles to fit in, but eventually proves herself worthy. Unfortunately her disapproving mother is kept out of the loop until the final dance competition in Detroit. Pam uses the power of dance to reunite with her mother and help heal her family's personal pain.

Sounds like the stuff of every musical or triumphant high school film ever made. And so what makes "How She Move" distinct is Ian Iqbal Rashid's inspired direction. This can be boiled down to three key creative choices:

The most important element of the equation is the cinematography. Relative newcomer Andre Pienaar shoots the film on good old fashioned 16mm celluloid film. From the first grainy frame, handheld with documentary-like intimacy the film instantly gets its street cred. Rashid appears to be inspired by the new wave of European social realist films, ie "L'Enfant" and "Four Months, Three Weeks and Two Days." But when the film requires it, the Pienaar glosses it up for an ultraslick music video worthy final dance competition.

Another key to success is setting its authentic urban environment – clichéd cinematic crutches about urban black communities which plagued other dance/step films are tossed out and rebooted with refreshing realism. Machoness is met with dance. No guns are popped, no knives or fists drawn. The film establishes believable conflict with words, attitude, posturing and dance battles. Few films of its kind – Hollywood or Canada - have even tried to leave the all-important handgun on the cutting room floor.

The third key creative inspiration is its cast of unknowns. Canadian cinema is a relatively small industry, yet Rashid and his casting director have found a full cast of fresh yet talented faces. In fact it’s a miracle to find such a high profile Canadian film cast with completely unknown actors, especially with its relatively small pool of black Canadian actors.

“How She Move” is not perfect though either. It sits at just over 80mins and it could have used another 10mins to flesh out its various character subplots. Pam’s scholastic troubles are given acute attention in the first half, but neglected and hastily wrapped up in the final act. Michelle’s academic goals are completely discarded in the second half as well, and when a dramatic kiss is pulled out of thin air in the last scene it revealed a virtually non-existent romantic subplot which I completely missed.

But "How She Move" is so fresh and visually and aurally vibrant its just nitpicking to over-analyze its story shortcomings.  As an aside, perhaps the most surprising aspect of the film is that it managed to open in over 1500 North American screens without ever playing at TIFF. This is encouraging for the industry which is usually so heavily weighed on those 10 days in September. Enjoy. 

"How She Move" is available on DVD from Mongrel Media in Canada and Paramount Pictures in the U.S.

How She Move